Is Just Strengths-based Resiliency
In a different package
When we are born, it's a natural
developmental process to end up with good self-esteem. When we don't
experience this, it's because we have been trained out of it. Our training
consisted of one part trauma (not succeeding when it was important to succeed)
and one part rejection (being abandoned or ridiculed for what we did or how we
appeared to someone).
This training can be reversed by using EMDR to "re-write" our own personal history. Once our history is re-written enough to begin supporting us, then we can use Strengths-based Resiliency to encourage ourselves to try again.
Many years ago there were hundreds of studies conducted to look at the 80% of people who became seriously ill following a year of high stress. But there were only a few studies that looked at the 20% who did not get sick. These were the resilient people who experienced a year of high stress and stayed healthy. What was the secret of their resiliency? Each one of them had the attitude, "I will do my best, and then accept what happens." In other words, if we are able to show up, do our best, and then accept whatever happens after that, then immediately we become resilient people and we have self-esteem. Praise, rejection, these lose their importance for us. What matters is whether we did our best. This is what gives us our self-esteem because guess what, it's our self-esteem.